Play ‘Burlesque’ BINGO!

Some of you may remember a movie from 2010 called Burlesque, starring Christina Aguilera, in her only big-screen starring role to date (thankfully), and Cher. Yes, that Cher. Don’t believe me? Watch the trailer. The whole cast will have you going, “Oh my God, what is [insert name here] doing in this movie?!” It’s worth seeing just for the novelty alone. And Stanley Tucci. Honestly, he makes every movie he’s in worthwhile. Other notable supporting actors include Alan Cumming, Kristen Bell, Glee‘s Diana Agron, Julianne Hough, Cam Gigandet (AKA the evil guy from the first Twilight movie, AKA Volchok from The O.C.), and did I mention Cher is in it? You can’t even begin to imagine the amount of glitzy camp that this movie brings to the table. In fact, as I was watching it with my mom, aunt, and cousin, we decided to try to make a drinking game out of it where you take a drink every time there’s some kind of ridiculous trope (e.g. a young ingenue moves to the big city to pursue her dream), but it quickly became apparent that if you followed the rules, you wouldn’t make it past the first musical number before you got alcohol poisoning. So instead, I created a Bingo game using all the various clichés from the film. (Before you say anything, yes, I realize how insane it sounds to waste hours of your life orchestrating a pointless game based on a terrible movie. Everyone needs a hobby, okay?) The rules are the same as traditional Bingo, except instead of random numbers being called, you cross off a box whenever you notice one of the tropes on your Bingo sheet. This occurs approximately every 30 seconds, so you really have to pay attention.

Burlesque makes its network TV debut tonight on ABC Family at 8:30. Before you watch, make sure you print out your own Burlesque Bingo sheet and play along. It’ll leave you wishing you had more sequined dresses and a wise gay mentor like Stanley Tucci.

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-L

P.S. Most of these clichés also apply to Rock of Ages, so feel free to get creative and try a Bingo double feature.

*Burlesque is trademarked by Sony Pictures, all characters and images are property of Sony Entertainment